Showing posts with label corona. Show all posts
Showing posts with label corona. Show all posts

Thursday, 27 January 2022

Day 3111: COVID

Welp, it took me 2 years but I finally succumbed to Covid-19. In the end it wasn't packed bus travel, flights, holidays, supermarkets, parties, clubs, bars, restaurants or any other of the fun or travelling-to-fun things that finally got me, it was a 6-year old child I teach. Of course, there's never any way to be 100% certain where viruses come from, but this 6-year old was very sick, carrying a snotty tissue around the school, and coughed wetly directly into my face around 4/5 days before the onset of symptoms... 


To mark the occasion, and because I'm sitting here in my house for the 4th day in a row with nothing much doin', here are some very Swedish responses to the pandemic I've observed over the last couple of years.

1. No Masks

I've been to the UK a few times during the pandemic and masks are a must-have. Everyone has at least one with them in a pocket or in a bag to put on when they enter a shop or public transport. This is a behaviour that simply never manifested in Sweden. There are some people who wear them, if I take my observation of busy central Stockholm shopping hubs as an example, I'd estimate that these are about 15% of people. On public transport, even when it gets really busy, I'd say its a similar figure. Last year before the vaccines came there was a definite increase in masks on the tube, maybe 75% of people wore them, but then the behaviour never stuck around after the summer.
When I went to visit the GP a few weeks ago I was wearing a mask, and seeing me wearing one prompted my GP to put one on. 

Additionally, if you ask someone why they're wearing a mask, more often than not they'll say its for protection - and there is a prevailing idea that masks protect the wearer and not everyone else around the wearer. Sweden often projects an image of itself as a society in which everyone plays their part in making the country somewhere pleasant for everyone else, but more than ever before has this fallacy been completely blown out of the water by the mask question. People wear them here for themselves, and not for everyone else - i.e. in the most pointless manner possible. 

2. Rapid Antigen Tests

Fast, cheap and reliable testing backed up with effective contact tracing is the backbone of the world's most successful Covid responses. Fast, cheap and reliable testing also never manifested in Sweden. For the last few months, "gargle tests" have become available in a few schools in response to outbreaks there, notice in response to and not preemptively. Workplaces here do not distribute or encourage regular self testing. Before meeting with groups of friends and family if you want to do a test you will have to pay through the nose for a stash of private antigen tests. This phenomenon has only now started to take off in the wake of omicron - friends and family in England have been taking "Lateral Flow" tests for the better part of the last year. I detected this manifestation of covid in myself with a lateral flow a good 36 hours before noticeable symptoms and kept myself at home a day earlier than I would have, saving me from meeting a lot of students and interacting with a lot of people.

3. State Mandated PCR Tests

Ok, so there's a distinct lack of fast N cheap testing, but I'm always blown away by the efficiency of PCR testing. There are multiple ways to get tested, always free, never more than a day or two away even in the busiest depths of central Stockholm. The method I've used most is to have a taxi courier drive the test to and from my house to a laboratory at state cost, even when I've come back from international travel. This method has kept several taxi companies running despite people not being able to go anywhere during some points in the pandemic. The results are collated and used for the national tracing strategy and to inform policy. 

4. Vaccines

Vaccine uptake in Sweden is among the highest in the world. You know what else is higher in Sweden compared to many other places? Trust in government. I'm not a sociologist or a statistician but I'd bet money there's more than just a coincidental relationship between those two variables. Vaccine uptake here is lowest among people without a Swedish background - you know who has most reason to distrust state machinery? Low paid immigrants. 

Taken from the Swedish Health Agency

 

5. Lockdowns

Or, as the case actually is, no lockdowns. Sweden never had any lockdowns. Some measures were brought in to minimise spread, at their height pre-vaccine these included limits on gatherings, no more than 4 seated at public tables, restricted numbers in indoor areas, no events, enforced closing time of 8pm in bars, distance teaching in high schools, working from home as much as possible and closed swimming pools. Schools stayed open as much as possible so that workers could keep working -  unless, like me, they were teachers and had to just keep GOING even when 50% of you were NOT THE FUCK THERE. After the first few months of covid, which predominantly affected the elderly in Sweden, a colleague of mine died and someone up above realised it probably was not a good idea to keep us carrying on as normal, so I did some distance teaching for a while. 

Even though there were no lockdowns like in other countries, there were times when central Stockholm was like a ghost town. People were afraid to go out, families met on zoom instead, I saw some old ladies last winter desperate to sit down after a walk together in the snow but too scared to sit indoors for a bit. I kept going to the local pub which had good social distancing measures and because the pub needed it - they lost so much business and recieved very little to compensate the loss. A lot of places have gone bust, although the majority of high street businesses here are chains that can survive. 

6. The Law

It is not possible under Swedish constitutional law to restrict the freedom of movement of citizens, and therefore you can't force them all to be locked down. A temporary "Pandemic Law" came into force early last year to allow restrictions on gatherings, international travel and the other measures given above, but it stops short of being able to enforce a total lockdown. It will be interesting, indeed it is already interesting if not worrying, to see how different countries dismantle (or do not dismantle) controls brought in for the handling of the pandemic. It is an academic question for the ages to assess who did what and why and what the consequences were, but in Sweden at least, this was the way the law was applied and the lack of lockdowns and higher spread of covid compared with her neighbors were some of the outcomes.

7. New Swedish Words

Covid has affected every language and changed the way we use several words - some concepts we use considerably more than ever before (vaccine, lateral flow, antigen, viral load, incubation time, contagious, covid, corona, antivirals, epidemiologist, just to name a few). In Sweden this means learning and comfortably meeting and using specialist words in everyday parlance that I otherwise would only have learned in extremely specific conditions (smittspridning, folkhälsomyndigheten, bekräftade fall, luftvägarna, munskydd, Anders Tegnell). Speaking of which, this might not be a specifically Swedish phenomenon, but a cult of personality erupted around the state epidemiologist, with people even going so far as to tattoo him on their bodies... 


8. What next?

Well - what next indeed. In Sweden I think people are resolutely trying to live a normal life again (which you can't do in the winter when everyone is smushed indoors with no air and the cases skyrocket). Shopping centres are crowded again, workplaces had a stint at trying to lure workers back from their mjukisbyxor (loungewear) and schools are carrying on even with half the staff and kids missing. But settling in to a routine in which summer is great and winter is despair is an inorexable and fundamental prerequisite for Swedish life!

Sunday, 7 March 2021

Day 2785: I'm so done with this Corona bollocks

There's an old adage that says "if you haven't got anything nice to say, don't say anything at all". But if I followed that rule I wouldn't have said a good seven tenths of the things I've ever said, and a good nine tenths of the things I've ever written. 

The only thing I've said about Corona on this blog is that people hoarded stuff way back last year (my god, that time span. Depressing.) at the beginning of the pandemic. I think I, like many others, was just hoping the whole thing would go away and I could go back to thinking about other things. But it's not going away. And I'm not thinking about other things - well I am, but Corona always crops up in there somewhere. 

If your life is based in a single place, your family and friends are in that place, your job is there, and your hobbies too, then your life became complicated in the sense that you were restricted from engaging in your usual routines and social habits. You probably have some kind of resentment (even though there's nowhere to direct it really unless you have a punching bag with an anthropomorphised corona face stuck to it, or one of the world's worryingly more common authoritarian governments) about losing out on a year of your life that you planned to use to greater effect. 

 

If your life is based in more than one place, that is to say your family, your friends, your job or your hobbies are not within reasonable range of your residence, then this year became fundamentally, world shatteringly more complicated. The situation may even have made you question the whole foundation of why you moved, and ended up living in what is possibly one of the world's most boring, antisocial, cold, quietly self aggrandising, disappointing, overrated and dark places in the world. Yes, I may have crashed out of the hypothetical there somewhat. 

Doubtlessly, life is miserable the world over thanks to Covid, and it is foolish to blame all negativity on any one place. The grass is always greener. A nasty side effect of moving from your home is that you forever wonder whether life is shit because life is shit, or because life HERE is shit, but if you were THERE it would be better. If you live in one place and one place only, you know for sure that life is just shit, you don't have this nagging pull at the back of your mind that you are much better suited to life elsewhere (though let's be honest we're all better suited to life on an environmentally friendly, politically autonomous, fully catered, private equatorial island). 

If half of your spiritual self is in one place, the other half is elsewhere, and a pandemic prevents you from uniting the two... well. You're basically living in a perpetual state of colossal FOMO, a self-developmental limbo, impostor-syndrome autopilot, in which you try to act like you're living your best life in Sweden even though you hate minus temperatures, you don't own a holiday cottage with a bit of land, you've never been, or wanted to go, skiing, you have no intention of queueing in the snow to use a virus ridden gym, you don't suddenly feel the need to contribute to an ongoing housing sales boom, there really is no need for you to get a dog just because everyone else seems to be getting one and above all else you absolutely, under no circumstances, will watch mello or any of the other drivel that this country calls television. 

"But there's no lockdown in Sweden!" I hear you cry. I can tell you now, hand on heart, that pubs being open until 8pm for people who sit in groups of maximum 4 people drinking beers at 8 quid after sitting at home on the computer for ten hours of the day really doesn't compensate for having the slimmest opportunity to leave this place and be with old friends and family that you havent seen for months and months. Worse still, that gnawing guilt you had about all the air travel your lifestyle required is now multiplied tenfold by the knowledge that everyone will be jetsetting all over the place when the time comes for holidays to be on the cards. Do you really want to be a part of that gas guzzling, carbon monoxide spewing, consumerist frenzy? Is there any choice in the matter?

Answers on a postcard.

Friday, 13 March 2020

Day 2425: How to hoard like a Swede

Last week was all about mocking the Australians because they were hoarding toilet paper.
Well.
This week was all about imitating the Australians and hoarding toilet paper.


This week was also all about learning the Swedish verb "to hamster" (att hamstra) which means to hoard things, although you (hopefully) don't have to stuff them in your cheeks. I went on a photographic tour of my local supermarket to document the things which Stockholmers consider hamsterable. How do they compare with your local supermarket?

1.TUNA
Pros: Keeps for ages and is good protein. Cons: Too much of it will give you mercury poisoning.


2. CANNED SAUSAGES AND RAVIOLI
Pros: Canned goods can be hamstered for eons. Cons: Canned ravioli and sausage. Do I really have to spell out the cons for you?


3. MOZZARELLA AND PARMESAN
Pros: Italy is on lockdown so when are we gunna get more? Cons: You're so fucked in an apocalypse if you can't live without a bit of melty cheese.


4. BEEF OF VARIOUS KINDS
Pros: Can be frozen, so you can eke out your high carbon, rainforest destroying existence for slightly longer. Plus it has that whole manliness thing going for it. Cons: Literally any other meat or soya product is less soul and/or planet destroying.


4.5 BUT ONLY IF IT IS MINCED
Pros: Make the burgers. Cons: SLAB of beef? What is this SLAB you speak of? No SLAB only MINCE.  There will be no SLAB in the apocalypse.


4.5.1 BLOOD PUDDING
Pros: I just...I don't even know, man. This is a cultural aspect of Sweden that I have not engaged with. Cons: It's a pudding made of blood. And they store it next to the cheesecake, which is a less desired apocalypse food.


5. FUCKING CARROTS
Pros: Beta Carotene. Cons: Why are you hoarding this? Super easy to grow yourself. Plus they're from FUCKING SWEDEN so there's like, 0 chance they will be blockaded/banned/taboo.


6. NOT CARROTS IN A BAG. OR AVOCADOS.
Pros: There are no pros here. You're all idiots. You only hoard if you have to pack the item yourself, or if it is ready to eat today. You won't even hoard it if it keeps for slightly longer and is clearly on sale. Nonsense.


7. GINGER
Pros: Immuno booster. I see why you all hamstered this. Cons: At 6 quid a kilo this is some serious middle class hamstering.


8. LEMONS
Pros: Together with that ginger you're basically immune to corona virus. Cons: Bit sour.


9. NOT YOU LIMES, FUCK OFF.
Pros: More for me. Cons: I dunno, y'all hate green or summat?


10.BAG OF LETTUCE
Pros: CLEARLY healthier than limes. Cons: Lasts about 5 minutes after you open the bag. A very poor choice for the long term apocalypse.


11. DRY PASTA, RICE, BULGUR, COUSCOUS, SPAGHETTI...
Pros: Bolognese for dayzzzz. Cons: This aisle was devastated. I have lost all faith in humanity.


11.5. KETCHUP
Pros: There's plenty of non-Heinz left. Cons: Swedish people eat Ketchup on pasta. Whatever shred of faith in humanity you had, it's gone now, hasn't it?


12. FRESH PASTA
Pros: You can buy it when all the dry pasta has been hamstered. Cons: At this point, everything is a con. Especially considering....


...13. FRESH SPINACH PASTA
Plenty of that. Hamstering is a very trend specific hobby.


14.BREAD BREAD BREAD BREAD BREAD
Pros: BREAD BREAD BREAD BREAD Cons: BREAD BREAD BREAD BREAD
You hear corona zombies in the distance, what is that they are braying after? BREAD BREAD BREAD.


15.POOR QUALITY CINNAMON BUNS
Pros: When all the good quality buns are gone, these ones will outlast even your last born children. Cons: They taste mostly of additives so that they can outlast even your last born children.


16. SHIT CAVIAR IN A TUBE
Pros: Salty. Cons: Fish eggs in a tube. Just....okay. I have a Swedish passport but I am clearly not Swedish because ... I don't get it.


16.5 GOOD QUALITY CAVIAR
Pros: Is fine people, plenty of it.Cons: Where's that facepalm emoji when you need it...


17.NESCAFE INSTANT COFFEE
Pros: Now when Swedes tell you that they are the foremost nation of coffee drinkers you can point out that, when shit hits the fan, they are actually the foremost nation of shit instant granules.
Cons: If you are a Swede who hamsters Nescafe then you have some reflecting to do.


18. CHEESE PUFFS
Pros: If corona has taught us something about Sweden, it is that they are serious about their cheese. Cons: If you eat just one of these puffs, you will in fact have to consume the whole bag. Not a sustainable hamstering choice. 


19. VANILLA YOGHURT
Pros: Er...It has vanilla in it? Cons: I don't understand why this one yoghurt trumps all the other yoghurts?


20.HICKORY BBQ SAUCE
Pros: Again.....the specific flavour. Cons: Hickory will forever be the flavour of the corona shutdown, eating hickory at any later date will transport you back to this terrible time of depression and desolation.


21.SALT
Pros: A good apocalypse choice, we can't live without salt! Cons: A box of salt lasts for literally years. How long do people think they are going to be in corona isolation?!


22. BROCCOLI
can fuck right off.