Day 543: GRAVEL

AAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGG  SO MUCH GRAVEL!

IT GETS IN MY BOOT SO I TAKE OFF MY BOOT AND SHAKE OUT MY BOOT THEN PUT ON MY BOOT BUT SOMEHOW THERE'S MORE GRAVEL ALREADY IN MY FUCKING BOOT! How is there gravel already in there?! I haven't even put my foot down! Can it teleport? Can it fly?

YEAH IT CAN FLY, WHICH IS WHY IT SMASHES LITTLE HOLES IN THE CAR WINDSCREEN WHEN YOU'RE DRIVING ON THE MOTORWAY!

And just look at this PILE OF SHIT I have to walk past on every FUCKING street corner! and LOOK HOW MUCH FUCKING GRAVEL IS IN THE BACKGROUND! That's not even the HALF OF IT.

Yeah that's right, I made the picture XL so YOU have to look at this fugly shit, too.

Really I should be thankful for the gravel because it stops me from falling on my arse when the floor is nothing but ice. BUT I'M NOT! LOOK HOW IT FUCKS UP MY NICE WOODEN FLOOR:

LOOK AT IT!

Door mat? Gravelly. Escalators? Gravelly. The bottoms of my shoes? Gravelly. Busses? Gravelly. Trains? Gravelly. Shops? Gravelly. My whole FUCKING LIFE RIGHT NOW? GRAVELLY.

One advantage is that when you vacuum the house it makes that satisfying gravelly noise because the hoover is picking up so much gravel. I guess that means I have to change the bag more often though, fucking gravel.

Eventually the council will come and pick it all up again, so that's nice. Not in my house though. Or in my shoe. And they won't fix the car windscreen or empty my hoover bag. Fuckers.