Day 468: How Sweet!

I've come to discuss this.

These are sweets. You can buy them in England. They're called mushrooms and when I was a kid I used to pretend I was Alice in Wonderland and that one side would make me tall and the other side would make me small.

But when I was a kid, the pink side was strawberry flavour and the white side had no flavour but sugar. These mushrooms here are BLACK LIKE THE NIGHT and it can only mean one thing in this country. Liquorice.

I'm not Liquorice's greatest fan. I'll admit to buying the occasional packet of Liquorice Allsorts, but not for the liquorice. The best sweets in the bag are the coconut one and the little pink or blue round one which have arguably the greatest sugar to liquorice ratio of all the choices.

That's right Bertie, I'll eat your face and feet.

Nevertheless these weird liquorice salty mushrooms are actually quite nice...I feel a bit wrong for having admitted that in a public forum. A while back Pretzel-Flipz used to be on sale in England, but only for a short time as the public just COULDN'T HANDLE chocolate (a sweet) with pretzels (salty) and I'm still and forever a bit disappointed in the British public for their failure to assimilate Pretzel Flipz into their hearts. Middle class people are coming around to the idea of salty/sweet now thanks to the advent of Salted Caramel (which coincidentally I hate.)

Here in Sweden once a sweet has emerged it's simply not good enough to only have one version. Let's examine this theory. We can start with the mushrooms. In addition to the salty ones above there are also the regular "strawberry" (according to the manufacturer's website, who knew?!) ones, and some "kola" ones (this doesn't mean Cola. It means Caramel)

Alright, thats just 3 types. But then, for those people who only like the white side of the mushroom (god knows why) there are sockerbitar.

Meanwhile those people who like the pink side of the mushroom can go for the Strawberry sockerbit. But I should probably warn you that eating only one of the two colours can cause you to be either excessively large or excessively small, such that doors could become unsurmountable obstacles.

And for those people who like the texture of mushrooms and sockarbitar but would like to branch out and try a different shape, there are foam bananas, or as I shall now refer to them, scum bananas since they are SKUMBANAN in Swedish. For the love of God, write to Ikea now and petition for a wardrobe or whatever called SKUMBANAN.

Don't tell anyone, but this is actually a picture of sugar free foam bananas

But what if you eat your own body weight in skumbanan and then you don't know how you can continue on from that point? Have no fear, chocolate scum banana is here (Or chocolate Mushroom if you haven't had your 5-a-day):

And if all that chocolate is getting a bit too rich on the palate, you can cleanse with a nice, refreshing, sour scum banana.

And when the sugar gets just a bit too sugary, it's back to salt. Salt bananas, that is!

Basically this post could go on forever with variants of the same damn thing, so I'll leave you with this gem I found while searching Google Sweden for all these sweets. And don't tell your excellent, Swedish dentist.